it's the end of the beginning
by sawitinhereyes
Summary: there aren't many times in his life he's been stunned into silence. / Logan & Rory, post-revival


**Note:** just one of a thousand ways this conversation could have happened. spoilers for the revival, obviously.

{ I own nothing }

* * *

He doesn't usually have scotch this early in the day. Not since college, anyway. He doesn't usually have a reason to drink scotch at five in the afternoon, but he indulges himself on particularly taxing days like this one.

Odette has decided she needs everything to be lace - lace tablecloths, lace napkins, lace fondant on the cake, lace dress. This after just last week she needed everything to be silk. Maybe if he's lucky, she'll keep changing her mind enough that the wedding won't ever happen. Thank God she's gone to Paris to visit her parents for a few days so he has time to recover from this splitting headache.

He can admit to himself that the real reason he pulled out the scotch is to help him forget that the one person he needs to talk to cut him out a few weeks ago, and he's going fucking insane without her.

He's not going to be dramatic about it. He accepted his fate a long time ago, long before Rory came back into his life. He thought maybe he could have his cake and eat it to, but Rory was never meant to be his mistress, and he never should have asked her to be. She deserves more than that. She deserves everything, and he wishes he could be the one to give it to her. When she broke it off, he had no reason to object. He wouldn't ( _couldn't_ ) break his engagement, so he had to let her go, and he had to be okay with it.

He's a fucking idiot. He knows that. He's _always_ known that. He's made a lot of mistakes in his life. He thinks the biggest mistake of all was making Rory the other woman in a relationship he didn't even want to be in.

What kind of guy makes _Rory Gilmore_ the other woman, and why the hell did she let him do it?

No, he knows why. Because they reunited in a time when she was lost and vulnerable and he needed to blow off steam, and if there's one thing he knows how to do, it's charm a woman to get his way. It's not like he's ever been able to resist her anyway. He didn't know at the time he was still in love with her, but it didn't take him long to figure it out. A better man would have broken off his engagement before falling back in love with his ex.

The bottom line is that he doesn't deserve her. It fucking sucks to think she was right to cut him out of her life, but she was.

He's just finished his second glass of scotch when he gets up to answer the door, and _fuck_ , she's even more beautiful than usual today, what's that about? Some kind of sick, twisted karma?

"Ace."

"I'm pregnant."

There aren't many times in his life he's been stunned into silence. He figures that one'll do it every time.

"Ace… what? I don't…"

Her blue eyes widen and she steps back. "I didn't even… she's here, isn't she? I can't… I'm sorry."

He catches her arm before she backs away. "She's not here. I… What? Come inside, please."

"I'm sorry," she rambles as he guides her to sit on the couch next to him. "I shouldn't have lead with that. 'Hi, Logan, how are you? How are the wedding plans coming? I was just in the neighborhood and figured I'd stop in.'"

His head is spinning. "Ace. Slow down."

"I just didn't know how to tell you, because this is _not_ the way things are supposed to go, and you're getting married, and I don't even have a _job_ , and what the hell were we thinking, Logan? How could we let this happen?"

"Holy shit."

"Gonna need a little more from you there, Huntzberger."

He feels like he might throw up. "Okay." He takes a deep breath and finally looks at her. "Okay. First of all, are you okay? Are you feeling okay? Do you need anything?"

She shakes her head. "I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm just freaking out because I'm pregnant, and I don't have a job, or a steady income, and you're getting married, and I'm _pregnant_ , and this is the worst possible time for anything even remotely resembling this but here it is. It's here and it's happening and… I don't know what to do."

He takes her hand in his. He doesn't know if that's allowed anymore, but apparently they're having a baby together, so he figures that changes things at least a little bit. "Rory. _Breathe_." She does. "It's going to be okay. I promise. We're going to figure this out."

"We?"

"Yes, we. What, you think the fact that we're having a… a _baby_ doesn't change anything?"

"It doesn't. You're engaged. You're getting married."

"Yes it does, Rory. It changes everything."

"It can't."

"I love you."

"You can't. You're marrying her."

"But I love _you_. I always have."

"You don't have any obligation to me just because of this, okay? I don't want that."

"God, Ace, I've begged you with my mind a thousand times just to tell me not to marry her. _She's_ the obligation."

"But-"

"No buts, okay?" He stands up, runs his fingers through his hair. "No buts. We're having a child, and that's a hell of a lot more important than whatever obligation I have to Odette or to my family or whoever the fuck else is gonna have an opinion about this. Your mom. God, have you told your mom?"

She nods. "I told her. She told me not to come."

He sputters. "Lorelai told you not to tell me."

"She didn't say that so much as implied it. She compared you to my dad."

Fuck. "You know I respect your dad, but that's not the kind of father figure I want to be associated with."

"You're not ready. Hell, _I'm_ not ready. Neither of us are ready to do this. I wouldn't blame you for-"

"Don't you _dare_ ," he says lowly. "Don't even go there. That's not who I am, Rory, and you know that."

"I _know_ ," she sighs in exasperation. "I know. I just… you have plans for your life. I don't want to be the reason everything goes off the rails for you. I don't expect anything from you."

"Listen to me." He sits down next to her, takes her hand in his, looks her straight in the eye. "I'm freaking out. Okay? I'm _freaking out_. I don't know a lot right now, because for me, this changes everything. But what I do know is that if this is what you want, nothing is going to stop me from being there for you, in any way I can. I love you, Rory. I know I have a hell of a way of showing it, but I love you, and if we're gonna have a baby, I'm gonna be there."

Tears shimmer in her eyes and a little piece of his heart breaks. "I'm sorry."

"Stop." He pulls her in, wraps his arms around her as tight as he can. "We're going to figure this out, okay? You and me, Ace. We're in this together. Promise me."

"I promise."

He doesn't know what happens next. He doesn't know what he's going to tell Odette, or how he's going to handle his family (read: Mitchum). He doesn't know where he'll end up when the dust settles. All he knows is that he loves her, and he wants to do this. He wants to be a father to their child. So he'll make it happen, whatever it takes.

She deserves it. They both do.

(All three of them do.)


End file.
